Motivation has become the latest motivational fad, joining “work-life balance”, “resilience”, and “put the oxygen mask on before helping others” mantras.
We’re promised that motivation alone can make us lose weight, exercise daily, or launch a successful business.
We “just” need to feel motivated. Moreover, we’re told that “when we’re motivated, things come easy to us.”
The problem with buying into the “motivation” hype is that we don’t achieve the desired results, we interpret it as a personal failure, voiced in statements such as
“I need to motivate myself.”
“I lack motivation.”
“I’m lazy.”
But why is motivation so hyped, and what other tools do you have to reach your goals?
Let me show you.
Motivation Reality Check
Motivation: Enthusiasm for doing something.
Wouldn’t it be fantastic to be enthusiastic about everything we do? The self-improvement industry would like us to believe so.
For example, imagine being
- Thrilled to clean your toilets
- Excited about waking up at 3 am to calm your baby who’s crying inconsolably
- Overjoyed to have a meeting with a very unhappy customer
You may be laughing, but what this points out is that we don’t require motivation for much of what we do every day. Or at least, not the kind of “enthusiastic” motivation.
Not only that, we do them without expecting to be “joyfully” motivated. Most of our actions come from other feelings, such as obligation, which can be self-imposed, legal, or contractual.
The “motivation” trope also minimizes the challenges along the journey towards our objectives.
For example, becoming a compelling speaker may be easier for a native speaker who is an extrovert and enjoys being the centre of attention than for a shy person with a stutter.
But why is the motivation cliché so successful if there are so many downsides? Because many profit from it.
Governments and Societies
The mantra that motivation is the magic bullet runs deep into our lives, and it informs policy to public opinion about what is acceptable or not.
For example, the UK government has recently made it much more difficult to claim disability benefits under the pretext of encouraging more unemployed disabled people to try to get back into work.
I was also shocked to read the stigma people experience when taking weight-loss drugs, as it’s perceived as cheating because they’re unable to stick to willpower, diet, and exercise alone.
The examples above are only two of the many ways we weaponize “motivation” against people enduring hardship.
The Motivational Industrial Complex
Nike’s successful slogan — “Just do it” — is an excellent example of how we’re sold the idea that we only need to want something to get it.
And many reap the benefits:
- Motivational speakers
- Self-help books
- “Aspirational” influencers
Does that work? For the business, yes, but it’s less clear about those expecting results.
A great example is TED talks, which are based on the premise that “powerful ideas, powerfully presented, move us: to feel something, to think differently, to take action.”
Their website highlights 2.5 billion global views and content shared 400 million times in 2023. I’ve personally enjoyed tens — maybe hundreds — of amazing TED and TEDx talks delivered by fantastic speakers about incredible ideas.
How many have changed my behaviour or “motivated” me to do something differently? Hmm… I struggle to think of one.
The defence rests.
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The Alternatives to Motivation
The good news is that we’re all living proof that we’re very good at doing things without feeling “enthusiastic” about it.
The problem is that often, we don’t remember that when we feel “unmotivated,” our environment — and our internalized guilt — blames us for it.
For those moments, I encourage you to use the checklist below
Reframing Motivation as a Luxury
What if you see motivation as the cherry on top rather than the cake? As shown above, we don’t summon “enthusiastic” motivation to do them (caring for a sick parent, cooking, changing diapers).
Instead, explore what other emotions you could use to prompt you into action. What about loyalty? Moral obligation? Pride? Curiosity? Frustration? Love? Anger?
If you need inspiration, check this list of emotions.
Chunking
Our brain loves rewards — even the small ones. Rather than always focusing on the big win (for example, the planned revenue in your business), take the time to set short-term goals (the number of prospect calls you will do in a week) and then celebrate when you achieve them.
Deciding in Advance How Enough Looks Like
When we start a new activity, it is easy to feel deflated when we don’t get the expected results.
- Launching a newsletter and having no subscribers after a month.
- Going to two conferences and not getting new business.
- Starting to exercise and being disappointed when you don’t see apparent changes after 15 days.
Deciding in advance how much effort we want to dedicate before quitting can help us keep going when the results take time.
For example
- I’ll write an article for my newsletter every week for four months and then evaluate if it’s worth continuing.
- I’ll attend five conferences and then decide if they’re worth my time and money.
- I’ll follow the same exercise plan for two months and then assess whether I should change or persist.
Group Support
Our motivation, stamina, and energy are variable. A support group can help us feel seen, put things in perspective, and provide a safe space to vent — all of them can contribute to helping us take distance from the situation and help us regain some momentum.
Coaching
A coach helps you to do what you want to do but you are not doing it by exploring aspects such as your goals, motivations, and limiting beliefs.
Coaching also provides a non-judgmental space to consider how other dimensions of your life play into your goals.
For example, maybe you tell yourself you’re lazy because you don’t find the time to start your business, but you actually experience fear of failure. Or you chastise yourself because you don’t write a post for social media every day anymore, disregarding that you’ve been experiencing health issues that affect your sleep and make you feel more tired than usual.
A coach helps you gain awareness of both your potential and the roadblocks in your way.
Wrapping Up
Can you imagine how exhausting it would be to be enthusiastic about waking up daily, brushing your teeth after every meal, or reading every email?
The thought makes me feel exhausted.
The reality is that society, governments, and businesses glorify motivation to serve their own agendas, often to our detriment.
That doesn’t mean that motivation is useless; rather, we need to question when it serves us well and when it’s used against us.
When we’re not doing what we want to do, we must remember all the other tools available to our disposal beyond motivation.
And that includes having a laugh.
Every dead body on Mt. Everest was once a highly motivated person, so… maybe calm down.
WORK WITH ME
Do you want to get rid of those chapters that patriarchy has written for you in your “good girl” encyclopaedia? Or learn how to do what you want to do in spite of “imposter syndrome”?
I’m a technologist with 20+ years of experience in digital transformation. I’m also an award-winning inclusion strategist and certified life and career coach.
- I help ambitious women in tech who are overwhelmed to break the glass ceiling and achieve success without burnout through bespoke coaching and mentoring.
- I’m a sought-after international keynote speaker on strategies to empower women and underrepresented groups in tech, sustainable and ethical artificial intelligence, and inclusive workplaces and products.
- I empower non-tech leaders to harness the potential of AI for sustainable growth and responsible innovation through consulting and facilitation programs.
Contact me to discuss how I can help you achieve the success you deserve in 2025.